“The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.”
Eric Hoffer PHILOSOPHER
If I’m dreaming, don’t wake me!
My life has been interesting. For the majority of my life, I’ve gotten by and made do. You know what I mean. I’ve never had any money to speak of. I’ve never expected to have any. I’ve never been destitute, but my life has had its challenges. There were times when I wasn’t sure if I’d make the rent payment and there were times when I couldn’t. There was a time when a bowl of beans or Ramen noodles was all there was to eat and I was grateful to have that. I’ve been homeless and had no idea where my next meal was coming from.
I was taught from a young age that if I worked hard and kept my nose to the grindstone that I would reap the rewards for my efforts. It took me a long time to realize that life is not always fair. No matter how hard you work.
But I’ve never lost that hard-working mentality.
The last several years have seemed surreal. I was terrified of making the move from Oregon to Texas. I was over 50 and I was going to Quit My job and move across the country to an uncertain future and start over. Madness!
It was the best decision of my life.
I now have a job that I love. I’m employed by the World’s Best Boss and I have a few wonderful friends that have my back no matter what the situation. I have family close by that I love and they love me.
Then there are the material blessings!
I make a good wage. I own a nice car and live in a nice house. I have the money to buy almost anything I want. My cupboards are full and so is my closet.
I will soon close on a house that I am buying. Me. Just me, buying this house. I can’t hardly believe it. (by the way, the financing went through!)
I’m incredibly grateful!! I have been truly blessed! If I’m dreaming, don’t wake me!
Copyright (C) 2018 Penny wilson
I have been horrible about completing the kind Nominations that have been given to me during the last several months. I must apologize for this. I do appreciate the nominations! I really do! I find that I no longer have the time to keep up with them. I have thought about this for some time and have decided that I must make my blog an Award Free blog.
My page that used to say Awards & Badges now says Award Free Blog.
Please pass along that nomination to someone else. The nominations are a great way for a new blogger to get their feet wet and to expand readership. They are also a wonderful way that the community here expresses gratitude.
So THANK YOU, THANK YOU for each of the amazing nominations I have received!!
As always, thanks for playing! Penny ❤
You’ve been there when no one else would bother. You know me better than any other soul on Earth.
You’ve always supported my decisions and you’ve saved me from myself, just in the nick of time; more than once. You’ve shared in my triumphs and successes and you’ve grieved with me during my losses.
500 Followers? Omg, omg, omg, omg, omg, omg!
I can hardly believe it! I remember quite clearly reaching 100 followers and just being thrilled! But 500? Wow! I am seriously overwhelmed! To think that there are that many humans out there that really give a rip about anything that I have to say is just mind blowing!
The sense of Community I have found here is such a blessing in my life! I’ve made some friends that I look forward to seeing every time I log in. The kindness and support that I’ve receive from my fellow bloggers has been just incredible.
Thank you, to every single one of you! You inspire and encourage me every day! You are truly a positive influence in my life and an inspiration to me.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you, thank you, thank you! ❤ ❤ ❤
I’m happy. I don’t really know why, but I feel really good. My life is going well and I’m just… happy!
Maybe it seems strange to you that I would talk about happiness this way, but I am so grateful for the happy days that I have to express it.
I’ve talked before about depression and the effects it’s had on my life at different times. I never know when it will strike again. And the bitch about depression is the fact that you don’t know that it’s happening to you until it’s got you by the throat.
You wake up one day, look around you and wonder how your world has become so dark, bleak and unforgiving. You know you have many blessings and many good things/people in your life. But the depression robs you of the ability to find joy in these things.
The joy you once found in music, or writing, or singing, playing the bongos, or anything else that gave pleasure is gone.
Depression creeps in and wedges into the little cracks and crannies of your life until it’s a full blown Dragon sitting on your chest.
The other thing that depression can do is make you immobile. I don’t mean that you suddenly can’t walk. What I mean is that the day to day things that used to be so easy are now mountainous to you.
The simple act of washing those few dishes in the sink, or taking that load of laundry out of the dryer, are acts that are just too hard to deal with at the moment.
Just existing is difficult.
You stop interacting with other people and you isolate yourself. Dealing with others is again, just too difficult. When you are in a full on assault from depression, you put on a brave face, so people don’t see.
Then you isolate yourself even more.
It becomes a terrible cycle. The more you isolate yourself, the worse your depression becomes. The worse your depression becomes, the more you isolate yourself.
People who have never experienced this don’t understand it.
Then one day, you’re looking out the window and suddenly the colors are more vibrant, like someone lifted the film from the window so that you have a clear view. You WANT to go for a walk, or wash the car, or visit family. Out of the blue you realize that you’re singing along with the radio. One day you’re sitting at the keyboard and realize that you’re WRITING again!
And just like that, you’ve made it through. The depression has passed. Maybe you had a change in medication, maybe you’ve had a change in your life, or maybe you just rode the wave. Whatever it is, it’s gone.
Will it be back? Will the dragons come creeping in the night to hide under my bed, waiting for their chance? I don’t know.
I DO know that today, I am happy and for that I’m grateful!
The month of May was a great month for me. I have so much to be thankful for! I set out to post something every day in May and although I fell short of that, I still feel very good about what I accomplished.
What I wrote during May was certainly not Shakespeare. But I WROTE. That was the goal.
I had a yard sale that was fairly successful and that money will go straight into savings. My sweet brother was kind enough to come help me with the sale. He worked his butt off and I am so grateful that he was there to help me! I love my Big Brother! ♥
Everyone here at the WordPress Community has been so helpful and supportive of me in whatever I am trying to accomplish. Thank you my friends for hanging in there with me! I am blessed and grateful to have all of you!
I’m looking forward to the upcoming months! I have some personal goals to shoot for and I now feel that I finally have some direction and can see the goal at the end of the tunnel! I’ll keep you posted!
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