Unfractured

by Penny Wilson Writes, posted in Writing

“Perhaps nothing of this broken world can be of a piece unfractured.”

-Dean Koontz -Forever Odd

*Being a wordsmith, an avid reader, and a lover of words; when I read or hear a line so eloquently put, it sticks with me.  I love this line and wanted to share.

Undertow

by Penny Wilson Writes, posted in depression, Poetry 

Pulled 
down

Swallowed 
whole  

Grayscale  

devoid of life  
anesthetized  

Undertow 
claws
clutches 
as I flail  

Tenacity 
keeps me 
afloat  

Gasping for air 
struggling 
toward life 
toward tomorrow 
toward the faith 
that buoys 
my soul

Copyright (C) 2020 Penny Wilson
Photo by Zukiman Mohamad from Pexels
*All is well, my friends.  Just descriptive creativity.  Better today than yesterday.  Better tomorrow than today.
Thank you for joining me on this journey.  ❤  Penny
 

Ebb and Flow

by Penny Wilson Writes, posted in depression, Life

The ebb and flow of life.  We all deal with it.  We all have trials and tribulations.  It’s part of our journey here.  Some days, I’m engulfed in the undertow, my feet being sucked down into the muck and the mud.  On these days, it’s hard to see the sunshine on the surface of the water.  I’ve been dealing with some personal issues and think I’m beginning to see the light.

Our winter has been uncommonly wet.  Until this last bit of dry weather, the weatherman said that we’ve only had, at most, 5 consecutive days of no rain, for months now.  Grey and gloomy skies.  Having no sun really can make a difference!

I know when my depression rears it’s ugly head.  I’ve battled the beast long enough to know it’s M.O.  Although not an easy thing to do, I went to my doctor and had an honest discussion with her about how I’ve been feeling.  Reaching out for help is the hardest part of battling depression.  But I know I have to.  I’m very lucky to have a doctor that I adore.  She’s wonderful.  The type of person I would like to be friends with.  Even with this knowledge, depression is a sneaky bastard.  It took me more than a month to set the appointment.

On the day of my appointment, while sitting in the waiting room, I almost bolted for the door.  It’s hard to describe.  But it’s like I’m have a battle, an argument with this…. being.  I KNOW what I SHOULD do, but the beast will argue with me, justify its actions and what usually happens is… nothing.  Depression can paralyze you.  You continue to put off getting help.  You don’t tell anyone how you’re feeling.  You isolate yourself to avoid uncomfortable situations.  So it’s even easier for the beast to dig its heels in and really mess with your head.  You isolate yourself more, becoming more depressed.  The more depressed you become, the more you isolate yourself.  Even KNOWING all of the ugly beast’s tricks, I still fall for them.

I feel better just having been able to Voice my concerns with someone.  I know I’m not out of the deep end yet, but there is hope.  I’m swimming toward that sunshine on the surface above me and it’s getting closer.

Copyright (C) 2020 Penny Wilson

*If you or someone you love is struggling with depression or other mental health issues, I invite you to look over my Mental Health Help Page which can be found HERE.  On this page, you will find several links on ways to get help.

Thank you for joining me on this journey.  ❤ Penny

Hiatus

by Penny Wilson Writes, posted in Life

being thankful quotes

I found the picture above and felt that it was very appropriate for today.  I have thanked you for joining me on this journey many times and I do mean that sincerely.  I’ve been going through what seems to be one thing after another lately.  I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed.  So I am going to take a step back from my blog.  A Hiatus, if you will.  I will still be popping in from time to time to respond to comments, etc.  But other than that, you probably won’t see much of me for a while.  I seriously feel like I need some Down Time.

Penny Wilson Writes is not done!  I’ll be back.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤  Penny

Weak As A Kitten

by Penny Wilson Writes, posted in Uncategorized

I’m still recovering from the flu. I’m at work today for the first time in a week and would have stayed home if I’d had the choice. Saturday night I had a fever of 102.  Sunday it was 100.  To just walk across the room took an extreme amount of effort.

But I’m better!  My fever is gone. I’m eating fine.  But I am just as weak as a kitten.  Yesterday I took a 2 hours nap and was still in bed by 8pm. I haven’t been this sick in a very long time.

I want to thank everyone that has stopped by my blog to wish me well.  It really does mean a lot to me.  I love my WordPress Family! ❤

I’m very glad that today is Friday.  I will have the weekend to rest up.  I’ll be back in the groove soon.  Thank you again, my lovelies!  I appreciate you more than you know!

Thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny

Image by Dimitri Houtteman from Pixabay