Depression & Mental Health Help

I've written about depression and Mental Health issues on many 
occassions.  This is a subject that I feel strongly about.  I do not 
think that it gets the recognition that it should, causing years 
of stigma on the subject.  

On this page, you will find my latest posts on Depression, 
Mental Health and where to find help.  Check back often for new 
information.  I will do my best to update this as often as I can.

If you have contact infomation on this important subject that you 
would like to see added to this page please Contact me using 
the Contact Tab at the top of the page and I will look 
into adding it.   

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

A book that was highly recommended to me is:  Troubled Minds–Mental Illness and the

Church’s Mission by Amy Simpson.

It’s OK to Ask For Help

Do you know a young adult or child that is struggling with depression, abuse, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, bullying, or other painful life event?  I discovered an AMAZING website that might help!  Go to YOUR LIFE YOUR VOICE .ORG   Call 1-800-448-3000  Or text to # 20121.  

This site has a ton of information on it!  You can text, chat, call, email your question or concern to get help.  They also have an App.  If you or someone you know needs help, check out this site!  Tell your friends!

Although this site seems to be aimed to young adults or kids, it has information on it that would be helpful to someone of any age.

Getting help for depression, suicide prevention and other difficult mental health issues is a subject that is important to me.  Please check out my page on Depression & Mental Health Help.  On this page, I’ve posted a lot of different articles on getting help for Mental Health issues.  

If you have contact information that I do not have listed on my Depression & Mental Health Help page,  please either leave the information in the comments below, or use my Contact page and send me an email and I will see about getting the information added to the page.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

*Thank you, as always, for joining me on this journey.  ❤ Penny



It’s like it’s a scar that must be hidden. Like some dirty secret.  An ugly sweater you keep in the back of the closet and only bring it out when that aunt comes to visit.  You hide it.  You deny it, even to yourself.

There are the days when you tell yourself “I’m ok”, as you look in the mirror.  You do what you have to do to to get through the next moment, the next hour, the next day.

But you’re not ok and you know it.  Your sleeping too much.  You’re avoiding any social interaction, isolating yourself.  Things that normally bring you joy, no longer do.  There is this dark cloud over everything in your life.

Why do people that are depressed deny it?  The answer is complicated.  Often, the person going through the depression is embarrassed.  They want to appear “normal”.  They don’t want people to think there is something wrong with them.  There is such a stigma attached to depression and other forms of mental illness that the person hides it from those around them and even from themselves.

Sometimes, they don’t know that they’re depressed.  They know something’s not right, but they don’t recognize it.  Depression is a sneaky thief.  It sneaks in under the radar and robs you of the joy in your life.

What can you do if you see that a loved one is depressed but they deny it?  Be there for them.  Listen, talk, check-in with them.  Take that extra minute, make that phone call, or send that text.  Get them out of their isolation.  Take them to lunch, pop in for a quick visit.

Since a depressed person will often isolate themselves, it is incredibly important to BE THERE, not just physically, but emotionally.  Be supportive, encouraging and most of all, be caring.  They won’t want your attention, at least not outwardly.  They will push you away and try to discourage you, telling you that they are fine that nothing is wrong.

Encourage that loved one to seek help.  If you are sure that they need help, don’t give up.  Don’t turn your back on them.  BE THERE for them.  You might just save a life.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

Copyright (C) 2019 Penny Wilson



Through my posts, I simply wish to inform.  My hope is that if someone needs the information to get help, and I’ve provided that information, I’ve helped that person.  I am NO expert professionally or medically on the subject of Depression.  My posts come from personal experience and self-education on the subject.

If you truly need help, please seek out that help through a professional.  I’ve listed a LOT of resources on my page Depression and Mental Health Help.  You can find that page HERE.

My best piece of advice to you, if you need help is to TALK to someone.  Anyone.  A friend, a teacher, a minister/priest, your doctor.  But TALK.  TELL someone what you are feeling.

Depression is a deep, dark, solitary-loving, beast.  If you’re depressed, you tend to isolate yourself.  The more you isolate yourself, the more depressed you become.  The beast just grows and feeds off your isolation.  This is why it’s so important to TALK to someone.

I’ve had a lot of comments when it comes to my posts on Depression.  My stats spike every time I write about it.  I appreciate the comments and all of the support I’ve received from everyone.  It’s amazing.  Truly wonderful, and I am so thankful

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

*As always, thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny


Those that think we can turn depression off and on like a light switch have never experienced real depression.  Being “sad”, or “low”, or “bummed out”, or “down in the dumps” happens to everyone.  This is not depression.

There are many TYPES of depression and many, many different symptoms for them.  I had one commenter describe her depression as feeling “empty inside”.  I’ve described it as being in a black pit, kept from the light.  Both are excellent descriptions.

This, in part, is a comment I received from someone on the subject. “ I strongly disagree with a statement you made though, which is why this comment. “Depression” is not an illness, but an emotional state of being that any human being might find themselves “feeling”.

Human beings are not powerless over their own emotions and “feelings”, be they positive or negative.”

You won’t find the complete comment because I refuse to give credence to this way of thinking.  

I know that we are not powerless over our feelings.   People who suffer from chronic depression deal with that every day.  We put on a smile and go about our daily lives.  There is no other choice.

This is just a snippet of an article that I found on the website Very Well, an excellent website with lots of good information on the subject.

Depression and Suicide

Depression and suicide are linked, with an estimate that up to 60 percent of people who commit suicide have major depression. However, millions of Americans have depression and this figure doesn’t mean most people with depression will attempt suicide. A study by the Mayo Clinic in 2000 found the rate of suicide among patients with depression was between 2 and 9 percent, while older studies using stricter definitions said it was around 15 percent.

Every time I write about depression, my views skyrocket.  Take this for example:

The spike you see on April 4th is because of my last piece on depression.  If depression is just a “feeling”, why are there so many people looking for and looking at this subject? 

Another piece of that comment that I received is this: “Ergo, changing ones thinking results in a change of emotional states…”

So I can just snap out of it?  Brilliant!!  Why didn’t I think of that!?

Anyone that thinks that a person with Clinical Depression can just change their mind and come out of it must be either living under a rock or completely stupid.

This is an excellent article written by the Mayo Clinic on Clinical Depression:

I continue to write about depression and it’s horrifying statistics, so that possibly, someday, this type of “snap out of it” way of thinking is gone. 

I could give tons of reasons and spout statistics until I’m blue in the face, but some people just don’t get it.  Unfortunately, this adds to the stigma on the subject. 

EVERY DAY 121 Americans commit suicide.  50% of those people suffered from depression.  Reason enough to write about it?  I thought so too. If you need help -The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255  Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

As always, thank you for joining me on this journey.


Excessive sleeping.

Constant fatigue.

Disinterest in things that usually bring you joy.

Isolating yourself.

Lack of concentration.

Persistent thoughts of hopelessness, sadness, or emptiness.

What does each one of these things have in common? They are all symptoms of depression. This list is far from complete, but it will give you an idea of what it’s like to have depression. Depression is much more than sadness.  

Depressed people become very good at hiding their symptoms. We put on a brave face, smile and go to work, or take care of the kids, or go out to dinner with our spouse. Outwardly, we are fine. No one would know the internal struggle we are having.

This is the reason so many people that are depressed and commit suicide are never found out by their loved ones until it’s too late.

This is also the reason that I write about it. To bring depression out of the dark and into the light where it can be acknowledged and talked about. Where the person affected can get the help that they need.

Depression is an illness. There is no shame in it. Let’s get real here, people. This is Real Life. In real life, people become depressed. It happens. There is no reason to sweep it under the rug, to hide it.   

If you or a loved one is having symptoms of depression, please seek help. Talk to your doctor, a friend, a teacher, just TALK to someone. 

If your friend or family member is showing signs of depression, TALK to them. Listen to what they say about how they are feeling. Sometimes, just knowing that there IS someone that cares, is a comfort. 

Depression is the #1 reason behind suicide. If you or your loved one needs help, these phone numbers are where you can get help for yourself or that loved one.   

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

As always, thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny


As the end of the year approaches, we all tend to reflect on what has happened over the course of the year.  I want to go back a little further than that.

In May of 2017, I came out of a several-years-long depression.  I remember it so clearly.  It was like a veil had been lifted and I was seeing the world for the first time.

With this in mind, I looked back at my stats for the last couple of year here on WordPress.

You can clearly see that in 2017 there was a good-sized spike in my activity here.  That new enthusiasm to write was due to the “awakening” from my depression.

My Most Viewed post of all time has been one I titled Depression-A-Killer.  That tells me that there is still a HUGE need for enlightenment, awareness and information.  The stigma remains, but I do think that the battle to end it is making progress.

Why do I write about Depression?   EVERY DAY 121 Americans commit suicide.  50% of those people suffered from depression.  Reason enough?  I thought so too. If you need help -The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255  Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

The one thing in my life that I am most thankful for is the end of my depression.  Depression took so much from me, it feels amazing to have my life back.  I’m happier than I’ve ever been and my life is full and rich.  I have many, many blessings.

As you can see this is a subject that is important to me. 🙂 ❤

As we go into a new year, I want to thank all of you that have joined me on this up and down journey.  I hope that each of you are blessed with every happiness your heart could desire.


*I’ve written about depression and Mental Illness previously.  I continue to speak out about this to help overcome the stigma attached to it.  No One Is Immune.  Please read.  You may just save a life.  

There was a time when getting out of bed and facing the day, was my biggest challenge.  The effort it took to get dressed and go to work every day was a huge struggle.  All I wanted to do was to sleep because when you sleep, you don’t have to face anyone.  You don’t have to deal with anyone or anything.

Most days, to cope, you put on your mask to hide the pain you’re going through, and you step out the front door to face the day.  You go through the motions that you must to survive.  You work, you cook, you eat, you bathe.  But that’s ALL you are doing.  Surviving.

Depression does that.

On some days, to brush my hair or bathe, was an effort that was insurmountable.  So I didn’t.  There were times when I slept the clock around, staying in bed as much and as long as I could, just so that I didn’t have to try to act “normal”.   I used as many sick days at work as I could get away with so that I didn’t have to leave my house.  This severity of depression also leads to agoraphobia.

Depression makes you lose all hope.  You feel as if your life is meaningless.  I was sad and miserable every single day.  I knew in my heart that I had many blessings.  I had family & friends that loved me.  I had monetary things that made life good.  I was fortunate compared to many people.  None of that mattered.  I found no joy in any of it.  I found no joy in anything.

I was in this dark, dismal cave of a life for years.

The thing about depression that most people don’t understand, is that you don’t always KNOW that you’re depressed.  You just plod along through the darkness day after day, week after week, not realizing what’s happening to you.

Depression is a thief.  Little by little it steals your life.  It steals the joy from everything.  It steals away your very reason to exist.

This is depression.

It doesn’t matter what social status you have, what gender you are or how much money you have.  You can live in a castle or a slum and still have depression.

Some people do not think that Depression is real.  They think that you can just “snap out of it”.  Some people are frightened, by depression.  They think the person is “crazy” if they are depressed.

My doctor described Depression’s effect on people like a complex wiring system that has bad connections.  For me, the medication re-routed my wiring system and corrected the problem.

Many people have lost their lives to depression.  There is a very long list of people famous and infamous that have committed suicide because of their depression.  Did I ever think about suicide?  Yes.  Did I ever come close to ending my life?  Thankfully, no.

One day, I looked around me and the sun seemed brighter.  The sky seemed bluer.  The colors were all sharper and clearer.  I was humming and smiling for no reason.

And just like that, I had made it through.  I had gone through hell.  I had seen the darkest and lowest part of myself and had come out the other side.

I’m one of the lucky ones.  Many don’t make it through.  Many people succumb to the darkness and hopelessness of depression.

How did I do it?  Why did I come out of my depression?  In all honesty, I don’t know.  I can guess.  But that’s all it is, is a guess.  I think there may have been several things that attributed to the end of the darkness.

I think the first and most critical change in my life is the medication that I’m on.  My doctor is a Family Doctor with a lot of good Common Sense.  I’ve always felt comfortable discussing my depression with her.  With her help, I have tried several different medications and I think we came across what happens to work best for me.  There can be a real process to find what works best for you and it takes time.  Don’t give up if the first thing you try doesn’t work.

The second most critical change in my life is my writing.  I’ve written to some degree my whole life.  I took that love of writing seriously in 2011.  In 2014 I came out of my depression.  That year, I had started working on my novel and blogging almost every day.

The one other huge change in my life since 2011 is my dog.  I got Rocket in 2013.  He is my almost constant companion and best friend.  My life would be so empty and lonely if it were not for him.  Rocket was a reason to get out of bed.  He needed to be fed and walked.

My writing has become a habit.  It’s a habit that I still have.  Writing, on some days, is the reason I get out of bed.  It gives me purpose.

There are so many blessings in my life now.  I truly think that my life has gotten better and better because of the end of my depression.  I’ve been at my job for seven years and have continued to advance and receive pay raises.  I have a nice car and just purchased a home.

I’m not only happy;  I’m content.

I don’t know if I’ve EVER been content.  I have always felt that I needed someone else to help me feel complete.  I think it was a way for me to try and find a way out of the darkness, the depression.  I thought that the right person would do this for me.

Not now.  I’m very happy just the way I am.  I feel stronger and more confident than I have ever been.

If you think a loved one may be depressed, know what to look for.  They may sleep more and be more withdrawn than usual.  They may not find happiness in things or activities that they used to enjoy.  They turn down offers to socialize that they didn’t used to.  They may be drinking more or using drugs.

I’m no doctor and no expert on depression, but I think I’ve personally seen the worst of it.  Because of this, I think I have some worthwhile advice for anyone that might be suffering from depression or anyone that may have a loved one suffering from depression.

  • Talk to someone.   A friend, a sibling, your doctor, anyone that will listen.  Tell them how you are feeling.
  • Have an honest conversation with your doctor. This may be a conversation that is difficult for you, but a good physician will listen.
  • Have your doctor check your hormone levels.
  • This applies to both men and women!  Off balance hormone levels can make you feel like you are losing your mind.  They can often mimic symptoms of depression.
  • Be open to change. Maybe counseling is the answer for you.  Or it may be medication.  Possibly a change in medication is the answer.  Be open to trying something new if what you’ve done in the past doesn’t work.
  • Maybe you need a dog! 😊  Don’t laugh!  My little dog gives me a reason to get out of bed every day.  He needs to be fed.  He needs to be walked.  This little guy makes me smile and laugh every single day.  He gives love and he’s something for me to give love to.
  • If you have a loved one that you worry may be suffering from depression, talk to them. This may be difficult because the last thing a depressed person wants to do is talk about how they are feeling.  Be gentle but keep trying.  Encourage them to seek help.
  • If that loved one comes to you for help, simply being an understanding ear can be a huge comfort.

There are several types of depression.  If left unchecked, depression can have serious and lasting consequences.  If it doesn’t lead to suicide, it can still do horrendous damage.  Do a little research if you see or experience the symptoms.  A little understanding goes a long way.

Depression is a sneaky bastard.  It creeps into our lives under the radar.  It pries open the tiniest of cracks in your veneer and preys on your weakest spots.  You will have no idea what’s happening to you until one day you feel like there is nothing worth living for.

There is no one that is immune.  Depression can happen to anyone.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-8255

Copyright (C) 2018 Penny Wilson


I’ve written a few times here about Depression.  Every time I do, my view stats skyrocket.  This tells me several things.  It tells me that lots of people are interested in learning more about the subject.  It tells me that people out there are looking for help.  It also tells me that more people are talking about depression.

This is GOOD!  Because more people need to be Talking about depression, Tweeting about depression and sharing experiences.   This subject needs to come out of the dark and into the light of day.  There is too much stigma attached to depression.  Too often people do not seek help for it.

The main reason for this post is to share some helpful information about where you or a loved one can find help, if you are suffering from depression.  In hindsight, I felt bad that I did not include more information in my last post on the subject of finding help.

I am NO expert on the subject of depression, mental health, or getting help for such things.  I’m just a person that has suffered from depression in the past and would like to help others that may be suffering as well.

Why do I write about Depression?   EVERY DAY 121 Americans commit suicide.  50% of those people suffered from depression.  Reason enough?  I thought so too.

If you or a loved one is experiencing depression and would like help, there are lots of avenues you can try.  Talk to your doctor.  Talk to a teacher.  Talk to a friend.  Talk to SOMEONE.  I know it’s hard.  But if you have someone that you can confide in, that’s a good start.

This website I found called has a TON of good information on finding and getting help.  You can find them HERE

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

They also have a terrific website that you can find HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

The bottom line is to TALK.  Please, just reach out and TALK to someone.  Anyone.  There is help available.  Just reach out a hand.  


How long will this subject remain in the shadows?  How long will it have such a stigma attached to it that people dare not even use the word ‘Depression’?

Life has no value to depression.  EVERY DAY 121 Americans commit suicide.  50% of those people suffered from depression.

More than 38,000 people a year commit suicide.  Yet 80 to 90% of those that seek help for depression are helped  using therapy and/or drugs.

The problem with that, is the fact that only about 50% of those that suffer from depression seek help. Why?  Because it’s a dirty little secret that no one wants to talk about!

Kurt Cobain, Robbin Williams, Mindy McCready, director of the movie Top Gun Tony Scott, linebacker for the Kansas City Chiefs; Jovan Belcher, actress Lucy Gordon and Jonathan Brandis-star of The Never Ending Story.  These are all people that committed suicide.  I could easily fill a page with names.

Depression is sneaky and deceptive.  It creeps into your life in such subtle ways, you don’t even know it’s happening until one day, you look around yourself and your entire word has gone grey.  What I mean by grey, is that your world no longer has any color to it.  It has no life.  NOTHING matters any more.  NOTHING brings you joy.  Depression has stolen that from you.

(this is one of those things that No One wants to talk about or admit to) I am one of the lucky ones.  I’ve struggled with depression off and on for most of my life. I never attempted suicide, but I did think about it at times.

Right now, I’m good.  Hell, I’m great!  Life is wonderful, alive and quite rich for me.  But I never know if or when it may come into my life again.  I hope never.  But I can’t be certain of that.   

WEB MD says that some of the signs of depression are:

  • Fatigue or loss of energy almost every day
  • Feelings of worthlessness or guilt almost every day
  • Impaired concentration, indecisiveness
  • Insomnia or hypersomnia (excessive sleeping) almost every day
  • Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in almost all activities nearly every day (called anhedonia, this symptom can be indicated by reports from significant others)
  • Restlessness or feeling slowed down
  • Recurring thoughts of death or suicide
  • Significant weight loss or gain (a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month)

If you know of someone that might be depressed, reach out to them.  Start a conversation.  Let them know that it’s alright to talk about it!  Let’s bring depression out of the shadows and into the light.  This is the only way people are going to feel safe enough to talk about it and seek help.  

* I found my information/statistics at various websites.  Here are a few that have wonderful articles on depression and how to seek help:



Mental Health America


The World Health Organization has determined that there is a suicide committed worldwide every 40 seconds.  By the year 2020, that number will double to every 20 seconds. 


 Depression is the #1 reason behind suicides.

 THIS is why I write about depression.  It’s a lot more than just a “case of the blues”.  Much more.

Did you know that there are more than 9 different types of depression?

  • Major Depressive Disorder (MDD)
  • Persistent Depressive Disorder
  • Bipolar disorder
  • Postpartum Depression
  • Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD)
  • Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
  • Atypical Depression
  • Psychotic Depression
  • Situational Depression

These are just the ones I could find in a brief search.  There are more.  So let’s end the stigma, shall we?  Depression is an illness.  There is NO shame in having depression.  There is NO shame in talking about depression.

If you think you might be depressed, please TALK to someone.  Talk to a friend, a teacher, a priest, your doctor, SOMEONE.

If you have a friend or loved one that you think might be depressed, TALK to them.  Encourage them to seek help.  Go with them if necessary, to that doctor’s office or church, hold their hand.  BE there for them.  You may just save a life.

If you have a friend that has mentioned suicide, DON’T ignore it.  Talking about it is NOT harmless.  TALK to them.

The National Suicide Prevention Hotline phone # is:  1-800-273-8255HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention. 

There IS help.  If you can’t get that friend or loved one to call, YOU call for them.  You may just save their life.


If you look at the graphic above, you can see that a lot of things encompass Mental Health.  I’ve written about Mental Health before, particularly Depression, since I have had personal experience in this.

I usually watch CBS Sunday Morning on Sundays.  I woke up later than usual and missed a great deal of it, but happened to catch a piece that actress Glen Close was doing about Mental Health.  She has had personal experience with it as well because it runs in her family.  This is a link that will give you the highlights on the entire show’s broadcast.  There are some wonderful links included in the article that you should check out and a video of Glen Close’s interview.

HERE is a link to the foundation that Glen Close co-founded, Bring Change to Mind.  This is a Wonderful site with a TON of information.  She talks about Ending the Stimga of Mental Illness, how to talk to people about it and a lot more information.  Please be sure to take a few minutes to have a look!

Depression          Schizophrenia      Suicide     Dementia      Self Harm      Postpartum       Grief      Stigma     Bipolar      Stress      Therapy       Drugs       

The list above are things that I have either experienced or have had it personally effect my family.  I’m betting I’m not alone.  It’s ok to talk about it folks.  End the Stigma.

Mental illness is called what it is for a Reason.  It’s an ILLNESS.


Depression is a thief.

I haven’t written about depression in a long time.  The reason I haven’t written about it is because I’m NOT depressed.  But with depression being swept under the rug or shrugged off by most of society, I feel that it’s important to write about it.  The subject needs to come out of the shadows.

I am feeling better mentally, than I have in more years than I can recall.  Life in general for me is wonderful.  I’m incredibly blessed.

What brought me back around to the subject of depression is realizing how much of my life was stolen from me by depression.  There were years that, although I functioned and went though the motions of day to day life, inside I was in a very dark and dismal place.  There was little in life that truly brought me joy.

Don’t get me wrong, there were times of happiness. Most of the time, I was simply putting on a brave face, just so I could manage to “act normal”.  Heaven forbid anyone find out I was depressed!!

There has always been such a stigma attached to depression.  There is NO shame in this disease.  It simply takes over.  YOU are not to blame.

Most people that suffer from depression go in and out of depression their entire lives.  That is how it has affected me.

Right now, I am having such clarity (it’s the only way I can describe it) in my way of thinking.   It’s wonderful.  I can see the positive.  I can feel the joy.  Of course life continues to have it’s normal ups and downs, but I’m not in that deep, dark pit that so often in my past had consumed my life!

The clarity I’m experiencing makes me realize how horribly depression robbed me of the simple joys in life.  One of the terrible things about depression is that it creeps into your life on it’s belly.  It sneaks under the fences of reason.  It hides in the corners and slithers around reality.

Before you know it, depression has it’s talons around your neck and it’s squeezing the very life from you.  You wake up one day in this pit of blackness and despair that you cannot shake.  You don’t see it coming and you don’t know when it will strike.

I thank The Powers That Be that I am feeling as good as I am.  I don’t ever want to take this feeling for granted.  I want to cling to it, to savor it.


I’ve heard people say things like “Oh, she’s just depressed”.  Just?

Most people, unless they’ve been there, have no idea what depression is really all about.  Most people use the word Sad.

It’s not really sad.  But yeah, sometimes it is.  It’a hollow, hopeless, emptiness, that consumes you.  Your world is black and bleak.  Nothing matters.

You could be expecting your first grandchild, or your son’s dream of attending Yale just came true, it doesn’t matter.  You put on a brave face, smile and act the part, but inside, you are barely functioning.

This is depression.

I’ve had times when all I wanted to do is sleep.  Because when you sleep, the world goes away.  You don’t have to deal with… anything.  Even if all that means is making dinner, or taking a shower, or driving to the store; it’s all just too much.

What you are feeling inside is an incredible darkness.  A hopelessness and helplessness.  You also feel worthless, defeated, unworthy and shameful.  So you hide.  You hide your symptoms.

This is why Depression is such a serious thing.  It can be a deadly thing.  When Everything is too much to deal with, what’s the alternative?

If you know someone that sleeps too much or isolates themselves, please reach out to them.  If they have stopped their normal pursuits, the things that used to make them happy, pay attention!  Just knowing that there is someone who understands can be a great comfort.

If you have these types of feelings, talk to someone.  Anyone.  Talk to your doctor or a friend or a counselor.  There is help out there.  There is No Shame in what you are feeling.

There is such a stigma attached to depression.  People have swept it under the rug or they dismiss it as something trivial.  It’s Not trivial folks!

Think about Robin Williams, Kurt Cobain, Mindy McCready, the list is a long one.

It’s real folks.  Don’t be afraid to start a conversation about it.