Glass House


Looking out through the glass walls, I keep my distance.  You see, the glass lets me observe life without getting my hands dirty.

Become a participant?  Oh, no.  Risk the safety of my glass sanctuary?  I couldn’t possibly!

I’ve built perfection here.  Everything in its place.  Everything as it should be.

Some people say that I must be lonely.  I have no time to be lonely.  Maintaining perfection keeps me busy.  I must tend to the Blue Bells next, for the rows are askew.

Later, I will lounge in my perfect straight-back chair and gaze through the perfect glass walls.  I will watch as you go about the messy business of life.  You love each other and hate each other.  You birth children and neglect them.  You give life and destroy it.

I have no need for such insanity.

I was like you, once.  I loved and had my heart broken.  I worked and toiled.  My children grew and turned away from me.  They have their own glass houses to build.

The stench of your evil does not penetrate my sanctuary.  I can safely observe what most would call life.

*I seem to be ever more aware of the passage of time and life not lived or time wasted.  I feel it slipping by me and I know I cannot slow its progress.  Depression was the thief that stole much of my life from me.  It shakes me to my core to realize that it took me this long to realize the precious jewel that is life. 

*I originally wrote and posted this in 2018.  Although not new, I felt it deserved a 2nd outing.  I hope you enjoyed.

Copyright (C) 2018 Penny Wilson

It’s OK To Ask For Help


Do you know a young adult or child that is struggling with depression, abuse, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, bullying, or other painful life event?  I discovered an AMAZING website that might help!  Go to YOUR LIFE YOUR VOICE .ORG   Call 1-800-448-3000  Or text to # 20121.  

This site has a ton of information on it!  You can text, chat, call, email your question or concern to get help.  They also have an App.  If you or someone you know needs help, check out this site!  Tell your friends!

Although this site seems to be aimed to young adults or kids, it has information on it that would be helpful to someone of any age.

Getting help for depression, suicide prevention and other difficult mental health issues is a subject that is important to me.  Please check out my page on Depression & Mental Health Help.  On this page, I’ve posted a lot of different articles on getting help for Mental Health issues.  

If you have contact information that I do not have listed on my Depression & Mental Health Help page,  please either leave the information in the comments below, or use my Contact page and send me an email and I will see about getting the information added to the page.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

*Thank you, as always, for joining me on this journey.  ❤ Penny

Depression and Denial


It’s like it’s a scar that must be hidden. Like some dirty secret.  An ugly sweater you keep in the back of the closet and only bring it out when that aunt comes to visit.  You hide it.  You deny it, even to yourself.

There are the days when you tell yourself “I’m ok”, as you look in the mirror.  You do what you have to do to to get through the next moment, the next hour, the next day.

But you’re not ok and you know it.  Your sleeping too much.  You’re avoiding any social interaction, isolating yourself.  Things that normally bring you joy, no longer do.  There is this dark cloud over everything in your life.

Why do people that are depressed deny it?  The answer is complicated.  Often, the person going through the depression is embarrassed.  They want to appear “normal”.  They don’t want people to think there is something wrong with them.  There is such a stigma attached to depression and other forms of mental illness that the person hides it from those around them and even from themselves.

Sometimes, they don’t know that they’re depressed.  They know something’s not right, but they don’t recognize it.  Depression is a sneaky thief.  It sneaks in under the radar and robs you of the joy in your life.

What can you do if you see that a loved one is depressed but they deny it?  Be there for them.  Listen, talk, check-in with them.  Take that extra minute, make that phone call, or send that text.  Get them out of their isolation.  Take them to lunch, pop in for a quick visit.

Since a depressed person will often isolate themselves, it is incredibly important to BE THERE, not just physically, but emotionally.  Be supportive, encouraging and most of all, be caring.  They won’t want your attention, at least not outwardly.  They will push you away and try to discourage you, telling you that they are fine that nothing is wrong.

Encourage that loved one to seek help.  If you are sure that they need help, don’t give up.  Don’t turn your back on them.  BE THERE for them.  You might just save a life.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

Copyright (C) 2019 Penny Wilson

 

 

 

Illuminating The Dark



Nightmares
and illusions

Challenges

Hurt
and anger

Barracades 

Pen and paper 
are sword 
and shield 

Adversity 
expelled 
onto the page

Consumed
banished

Darkness
illuminated
once more  

Copyright © 2019 Penny Wilson

I’m Not A Doctor, I Just Play One on TV ;)


Through my posts, I simply wish to inform.  My hope is that if someone needs the information to get help, and I’ve provided that information, I’ve helped that person.  I am NO expert professionally or medically on the subject of Depression.  My posts come from personal experience and self-education on the subject.

If you truly need help, please seek out that help through a professional.  I’ve listed a LOT of resources on my page Depression and Mental Health Help.  You can find that page HERE.

My best piece of advice to you, if you need help is to TALK to someone.  Anyone.  A friend, a teacher, a minister/priest, your doctor.  But TALK.  TELL someone what you are feeling.

Depression is a deep, dark, solitary-loving, beast.  If you’re depressed, you tend to isolate yourself.  The more you isolate yourself, the more depressed you become.  The beast just grows and feeds off your isolation.  This is why it’s so important to TALK to someone.

I’ve had a lot of comments when it comes to my posts on Depression.  My stats spike every time I write about it.  I appreciate the comments and all of the support I’ve received from everyone.  It’s amazing.  Truly wonderful, and I am so thankful

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

*As always, thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny

The Lies I Tell Myself



I can do this. Deep breath. Hands shaking. 

I can do this.

Shake it off. Mirror check. Smile. One more deep breath.

I can do this.

Open the door. 

No.  

Trembling. Weak knees. Sweating. Shaking.

I can do this. 

Step across the threshold. Face the world.

I can do this.  

Copyright (C) 2019 Penny Wilson

*Depression. Deep. Real. Depression, can be so debilitating, it 
can make you immobile, frozen. There are days when it's 
hard to leave the house. It's even hard to leave your bed. 
You put on a smile and face the world. Because you have to. 
You tell yourself, whatever lies you have to, in order to 
maintain the facade that everything is alright. 
As always, thank you for joining me on this journey.  Penny 

 

 

Help Me Help Them-Mental Health Awareness Week


Who knew?  I had no idea that it was Mental Health Awareness Week until I was browsing thru my Reader feed earlier today.  I recently added a new page to my blog. The Page is called Depression and Mental Health Help.  Here, I’ve listed contact information for those struggling with Depression and other Mental Health issues and where help can be found.  If you have important contact information that is not listed on this page and you would like for it to be added, please either send me an email thru my Contact Page or leave the information in the Comments below.  I will do my best to get the added information on the page as soon as I can.

As always, thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny

Mental Health Awareness Week — TheFeatheredSleep


REBLOG: Please read this eloquent piece of Reality from The Feathered Sleep.

She doesn’t look sick….. She isn’t sick. But a black hole is eating her from the inside out. The devour has no real description It defies the usual ones, it has a wider mouth, deeper jaw, longer bite The thing of it is .. the shame .. that’s the worst part The little voice which […]

via Mental Health Awareness Week — TheFeatheredSleep

~💚~ Welcome to Mental Mingling ~💚~ Mental Health Awareness Month Meet & Greet! #1 May 3, 2019 💚 — Beckie’s Mental Mess


REBLOG: Be sure to check out Beckie’s Mental Mingling post! ❤

Hello! Welcome to “Mental Mingling” The first out of five weeks where you get to meet old and new bloggers alike in the mental health community. I had started this a year ago, and I found that it was a great resource to all bloggers that deal with mental illness/disorders to meet one another, learn […]

via ~💚~ Welcome to Mental Mingling ~💚~ Mental Health Awareness Month Meet & Greet! #1 May 3, 2019 💚 — Beckie’s Mental Mess

Gravity


The energy it takes
to pull my feet from this earth
seems insurmountable. 

Each step
burdensome
cumbersome
massive. 

I lift my head
seeing the sunlight
breaking through the darkness ahead. 

Just a sliver. 

Hope. 

I advance
determined to reach
the cloudless space.

A deep breath. 

My conviction
wavering.

Fragments are found
somewhere deep inside.

Another step.

A small victory.

Another step.

I feel warmth
coming from the light.

One last step... 

Triumph. 

Copyright (C) 2019 Penny Wilson

Image by intographics from Pixabay

*All is well, my friends.  This post started out as something very dark but turned around for me. (I never know the path my muse will take.)  I think it says that the light IS peeking through for me.  As always, thank you for joining me on this journey. ❤ Penny