They told me yesterday that you had passed. I was startled by how hard it hit me. Your my "Ex". What am I feeling? Why does it feel like a punch in the gut?
I don't know exactly when we lost it. When it had just.... gone. You were my forever. You were going to be the last person I laid eyes on as I took my last breath. Or so I thought; hoped.
In the early days, we were so enraptured with each other, the world outside of "us" just didn't matter. There were years with you that I could not believe how incredibly, blissfully, happy I was. If you looked into my eyes, I knew you were seeing forever, just as I was seeing it in yours. How did we let that go?
We somehow went from not wanting to live without the other to not being able to stand the sight of the other.
Years after we parted, I was sitting at a red light in my car when I suddenly broke down, sobbing at the loss of what we had. The Treasure, the Dreams that we let slip through our fingers.
The divorce didn't break me. The years of loneliness didn't either.
It was What We Had Meant To Each Other and What We Had Built Together.
That's what broke me.
To Squander such happiness... such love....
It's rare to experience such a depth of passion, bliss, appreciation, devotion, friendship and love as what we shared. For that, I am forever grateful for having had you in my life.
I pray that you are at peace.
Copyright (C) 2020 Penny Wilson
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