Posted in depression

Depression and Denial

It’s like it’s a scar that must be hidden. Like some dirty secret.  An ugly sweater you keep in the back of the closet and only bring it out when that aunt comes to visit.  You hide it.  You deny it, even to yourself.

There are the days when you tell yourself “I’m ok”, as you look in the mirror.  You do what you have to do to to get through the next moment, the next hour, the next day.

But you’re not ok and you know it.  Your sleeping too much.  You’re avoiding any social interaction, isolating yourself.  Things that normally bring you joy, no longer do.  There is this dark cloud over everything in your life.

Why do people that are depressed deny it?  The answer is complicated.  Often, the person going through the depression is embarrassed.  They want to appear “normal”.  They don’t want people to think there is something wrong with them.  There is such a stigma attached to depression and other forms of mental illness that the person hides it from those around them and even from themselves.

Sometimes, they don’t know that they’re depressed.  They know something’s not right, but they don’t recognize it.  Depression is a sneaky thief.  It sneaks in under the radar and robs you of the joy in your life.

What can you do if you see that a loved one is depressed but they deny it?  Be there for them.  Listen, talk, check-in with them.  Take that extra minute, make that phone call, or send that text.  Get them out of their isolation.  Take them to lunch, pop in for a quick visit.

Since a depressed person will often isolate themselves, it is incredibly important to BE THERE, not just physically, but emotionally.  Be supportive, encouraging and most of all, be caring.  They won’t want your attention, at least not outwardly.  They will push you away and try to discourage you, telling you that they are fine that nothing is wrong.

Encourage that loved one to seek help.  If you are sure that they need help, don’t give up.  Don’t turn your back on them.  BE THERE for them.  You might just save a life.

The Suicide Prevention Hotline, available 24/7 is 1-800-273-8255

A terrific website on this can be found HERE.

There is a site specifically to help our veterans.  Find that site HERE.

Is talking to someone too much for you?  It was for me in the past at times.  There is a Crisis Text Line.  Text 741741 and you can text with a counselor.

Want to do an online chat?  There’s a site for that too.  Find it HERE.

You can even TWEET with a crisis counselor at @800273TALK on Twitter.

HERE is a link to many international phone #’s for Suicide Prevention.

This is a British number to help Children in crisis.  08001111

Copyright (C) 2019 Penny Wilson





Penny Wilson is an international writer who writes in several genres. She has written articles for WOW Women on Writing. Her poetry has been published in online journals, such as Ariel Chart, Spill Words Press and the Poppy Road Review. Penny is a member of the Austin Poetry Society. Her poetry has been featured in the publication America's Emerging Poets 2018 & 2019 by Z Publishing and Poets Quarterly and Dual Coast Magazine published by Prolific Press. Penny is an advocate for Mental Health Awareness and has the page "Mental Health Help" on her blog. She writes about the struggles of mental illnesses and Depression. She is passionate about spreading awareness for Suicide Prevention and Domestic Abuse. She expresses her passion through her writings of poetry and life experiences. You can find more of her writings on her blog at and follow her on Twitter @pennywilson123.

41 thoughts on “Depression and Denial

  1. Thanks for this article! It’s nice to find more people with the same advocacy on mental health through starting a conversation. I delivered a speech to college students last Saturday. It’s titled ‘The situation is a lot more nuanced than that: A meditation on mental health through Crazy ex-girlfriend.’ I decided to post a four-part lecture on it on my WordPress page.
    Here is the second part:
    Meanwhile, here’s the first part:

    Thank you for reading my posts and I hope that you give me thoughts on my speech. Follow me too. Be well!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Just an FYI, I’ve also recently added another Page to my homepage. It’s a page that lists agencies for help as well as a place to repost some of these types of posts. You might want to give that a look. And thank you again!!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Penny, this is such a moving post. Everything that you brought up in regards to depression is spot -on. I’ve just come out of a depressive episode that lasted 3&1/2 months, the one prior was even longer. While you’re in it, it feels like a murky swamp that won’t release you, once you break free…OMG! It’s like you are born again.
    Thank you so very much for sharing this with us. I hope you don’t mind, but I would like to RB it on my site as well. This plenty of information that might assist another person in need.


  3. An excellent post Penny. Sadly, it will be a long time coming before society allows for the normalisation of topics such as these to be discussed freely and to discard and throw away taboo and stigma. When society realises that this so called elephant in the room already sits in everyone’s head and is simply called ‘mental health’ and not ‘poor mental health’ or ‘good mental health’ then these topics will be able to be discussed freely and people will not feel even more depressed because they think it’s not ok to not be ok’.

    Why, after everything that has passed we are still in this position with regards health is quite beyond me.

    Society will talk about everything online freely and like it’s some kind of phat trend from porn to horn, to what they eat and watch on television, the movies, what bloody underwear they are buying into, their bloody social media stakes, but and yet the moment, mental health is opted, they walk away pretending they are deaf or struck dumb.

    Again excellent post 🙂


      1. And that Penny, is worth your weight in gold, so you carry on – because the only way to beat stigma, taboo and the rooms filled with elephants is to talk about it 🙂


  4. Penny, thanks for continuing to shine the light on the darkness of depression and mental illness in general. Your honesty, your insights, your suggestions help everyone. Together we can be that voice that rises above the stigma, that voice that cares, that voice that educates. That voice which is heard. You, my darling, are a strong voice and I thank you for speaking it here.

    Liked by 1 person

Comments are closed.