Treasured Scars

I was never able to hold my breath long enough to avoid the stench of you. Your slurred, dribbling nonsense turned my stomach.  It was a game you enjoyed.  You would watch my face to see how long it took before I became repulsed. 

In your eyes it was fun; harmless. 

I would watch the anger wash over you as the booze took you away.  You were body-snatched, replaced by a monster.  The monster hated anyone in it’s path.  But the hatred was for itself most of all.  The hate engulfed all and rage was the only outlet. 

It was a cry of pain, a cry of self-loathing, unleashed and lashing out at all of those you came into contact with. 

I was the closest target.  Convenient.  

In the light of day, with pounding head and sweaty palms, you could always justify it.  The sorry’s were meaningless.  The flowers withered like my spirit.  Your caustic soul was revealed again and again. 

I prayed for your salvation and I prayed for your demise.  I prayed for strength, for both of us. 

I packed up my sanity, guarding it carefully and ran.  I didn’t realize that my escaping would open the floodgates to the demons you had hidden from even yourself. 

My freedom is dear to me, paid for with anguish and a piece of my soul.  My sanity, at times precariously balanced on a knife edge. 

The scars I have are treasured things.  They keep me safe.

Copyright (C) 2018 Penny Wilson

About Penny Wilson Writes

Penny Wilson is a freelance writer who writes in several genres. She has written articles for WOW Women on Writing. Her poetry has been published in online journals, such as Ariel Chart, Spill Words Press and the Poppy Road Review. Penny is a member of the Austin Poetry Society. Her poetry has been featured in the publication America's Emerging Poets 2018 & 2019 by Z Publishing, Poets Quarterly and Dual Coast Magazine published by Prolific Press. You can find more of her writings on her blog at https://pennywilsonwrites.com/ and follow her on Twitter @pennywilson123.
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17 Responses to Treasured Scars

  1. Beautiful write Penny. Scars- emotional and physical are roadmaps of our life. Happy you moved on.

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  2. such deep powerful emotions!

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  3. Wow, Penny, an incredibly powerful piece of writing.

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  4. This is so powerful and emotive ❤

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  5. Ooo Penny, this one hurts. I hope if you speak from experience you wear your scars with the pride of a survivor. 😔

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  6. I packed up my sanity, guarding it carefully and ran.
    I am thankful you ran. You are a strong woman.

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  7. WaltPage says:

    Scars should be treasured. They show that we have survived! Hugs dear friend. ☺❤

    Like

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