Posted in Stories

Andy Rooney’s Eyebrows

Quite a few of you are not going to be familiar with the man in the photo above.  His name was Andy Rooney.  He passed away in 2011.   Mr. Rooney was a staple in American living rooms for many years.  He had a short segment on the TV show 60 Minutes.  The picture above is how I always remember Andy Rooney.  Sitting at his desk, wearing a respectable coat and tie, surrounded by books.

Andy’s segments were always a Human Interest piece that would be the last few minutes of the 60 Minutes show.  The pieces were humorous most of the time.  I loved his segments and always looked forward to them.

The reason I bring up the subject of Mr. Andy Rooney will be much more apparent in the next photo.

Mr. Rooney had the bushiest, craziest eyebrows I’ve ever seen!  They HAD to be in his field of vision!  Maybe he liked them bushy.  Maybe Mrs. Rooney liked them bushy.  We will never know.

This is a quote of his: “I don’t know what to do. I try to look nice. I comb my hair. I tie my tie. I put on a jacket. But I draw the line when it comes to trimming my eyebrows. You work with what you got.”

I met a man that had Andy Rooney eyebrows.  This is the story of that meeting.

Internet Dating can be a joy to some, a nightmare to others.  Although nothing bad has ever happened to me, I’ve had more unpleasant experiences than good ones.

I had been communicating with a gentleman, we will call him Bob, for a couple of weeks.  We sent numerous emails back and forth, then text messages, then phone calls.  Bob’s online profile did not reveal his eyebrows.  The only picture on his profile was taken at enough of a distance that I either couldn’t tell or they just didn’t show up very well.  Just like with Andy’s first picture, you can’t really tell unless you know to look for them.

The communication between Bob and I was wonderful.  I enjoyed this man’s wit and humor.  He also seemed to have a compassionate side that I found very appealing.  I got to the point where I looked forward to his daily text messages.  Our phone conversations were quite lengthy at times.  I LIKED this guy.

Eventually, Bob and I decided to meet for lunch.  I was excited!  After weeks of communicating with Bob, we were finally going to meet.

I’m always early, so I arrived at the restaurant first.  Lunch was at a casual Mexican restaurant, so I dressed in jeans, a nice blouse and sandals.  It was a beautiful day, so I was standing outside when Bob pulled up.

(Let me back up here just a little bit.  If you have followed my blog for any length of time, there are a couple of things you know about me. #1. I’ve been a bit of a Wild Child in my youth.  #2. I am now 60+ years old.  I guess I have out grown some of that Wild Child.  Activities and other things that I used to find appealing, just Aren’t any more.)

Bob arrived for lunch on his Chopper (Ape Hanger handlebars) motorcycle.  He was wearing a doo-rag, T-shirt and jeans. We exchanged hellos and entered the restaurant.

I’ve been doing the Internet Dating thing long enough to know that you just cannot really prepare yourself for what happens at that first meeting.  I also try to make the best of things.  No matter what, I try to be pleasant and cordial.  It might as well be a good experience for everyone involved.

We are seated in a booth and I finally get to have a close look at Bob.  It turns out that Bob wears glasses.  He also has long-ish hair.  Just a couple more little facts that did not show up on his profile.

We are chatting away while we browse the menu and making small talk.  I like to make eye contact when I’m talking to someone.  You can tell a lot with eye contact.

At first it didn’t dawn on me, but I was having trouble making eye contact with Bob.

The reason was a combination of his Andy Rooney eyebrows and his glasses.

You see, Bob had a habit of looking over the top of his glasses at you when he talked.  It’s a habit that many of us have.  I do it myself when I have my readers on.

Between the top of his glasses and the bottom of his Andy Rooney eyebrows was a space of Maybe 1/4″, where I could see his eyes.  I kept trying to go under his glasses or his eyebrows to see his eyes.  I found that my head was bobbing and weaving, trying to accomplish this!

I found it Very Uncomfortable to talk to Bob.  Trying to make eye contact was impossible.  It about made me dizzy to try!

Now, considering all the things that surprised me about my meeting with Bob, I could have over-looked many of them.  The motorcycle is not my cup of tea.  Neither is the doo-rag.

But I could Not get past the Andy Rooney eyebrows.

*As a side note, Google “Andy Rooney Quotes”.  The man was filled with wisdom, wit and common sense.

**Photos gratefully acknowledged  from Google Images and the original photographer.  

Copyright (C) 2018 Penny Wilson

***Day 29 of my 30 day Post-A-Day challenge.  🙂








Penny Wilson is a freelance writer who writes in several genres. She has written articles for WOW Women on Writing. Her poetry has been published in online journals, such as Ariel Chart, Spill Words Press and the Poppy Road Review. Penny is a member of the Austin Poetry Society. Her poetry has been featured in the publication America's Emerging Poets 2018 & 2019 by Z Publishing, Poets Quarterly and Dual Coast Magazine published by Prolific Press. You can find more of her writings on her blog at and follow her on Twitter @pennywilson123.

15 thoughts on “Andy Rooney’s Eyebrows

  1. I agree–bushy eyebrows are a deal breaker! I LOVED Andy Rooney when I was a kid. My dad was a hard-core 60 minutes fan, so dinner was always done by 7 on Sundays so he could watch. I used to run into the room for that last 5 minutes to catch that cranky old dude! Fun fact: I am 93% sure that if I stopped grooming my eyebrows, I could achieve Andy Rooney status. (I am dead serious)


  2. Bahahaha! This one cracked me up. I don’t think I could’ve had a relationship with “brows” even if he was the sweetest guy on earth. Those brows are just too darned bushy.
    Our comment about Mrs Rooney made me spit my drink 🤗


  3. I loved this! And I’m with you. I like eye contact. Over the years I’ve had many patients who would not make eye contact with me. One explained that she had been told that white people did not like eye contact with black. I told her I had never heard that, but I preferred the contact. She always looked at me after that. I’ve also heard that not making eye contact is a sign of lying.
    Bushy eyebrows are not a problem for me. If they were on me, I’d have to keep them trimmed! I have issues with the droopy eyelids where the person looks either bored to tears or half asleep. Yet that’s one of the points the doctor used when he diagnosed my myasthenia gravis. I can’t count the number of times people told me I looked sleepy!
    Sorry it didn’t work out with Bob.


  4. I would have had the same issue. Eye contact is essential in conversation. You can tell a lot from someone’s eyes, how they use them to communicate or not. Did you make it through that lunch and how did you ditch Bob?


    1. I did manage to make it through lunch. Like I said in my piece, I try to make it a pleasant experience. I took the easy way out, I sent him a text afterward telling him that I did not think we would be a good match. I did not elaborate. I didn’t want to hurt the guy’s feelings.
      Thanks for stopping by Audrey!


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